My babies are currently outside playing in the neighbors’ backyard, and I feel guilty.
They’re getting their vitamin D, imagination and dirt on right now.
I’m sitting at the back door watching and listening to them as I write.
The four kids--my two girls and the two neighbor boys--are all having a GREAT time. I can hear my 6 year old giggling non-stop.
So why the guilt?
Is it because I’m at home enjoying some quiet time?
Because I feel like if I’m not helicopter-momming 24/7 that I’m not being a “good” mom?
Is it because I’m assuming the neighbor parents are assuming that I’m lazy for not being outside with them (even though I’m inside technically doing my work and also technically still observing and listening to what’s going on outside)?
Does the reason that I feel guilty right now even matter? Am I just biologically programmed to feel guilt because I’ve bared children and the reasons are all just stories?
I don't know.
Here’s what I do know about Mom Guilt: I am not alone.
I am far, far from alone.
Many of the women DCs in our Mama Chiropractors tribe are women who have husbands who work a LOT and who have 2-4 children at home.
Many of these husbands—regardless of if they’re work is adjusting patients, something in engineering or something else—are working long, hard, stressful hours.
The days all blur together for them.
Their work schedules and demands don’t allow them to drop the kids off or pick them up from school.
They don’t have time or energy to cook healthy food, and they don’t work out as often as they used to.
Right or wrong, these dads are one-dimensional men.
The moms, however, are living life differently than their husbands.
They work part-time, even though more hours working would mean more income.
They sacrifice that extra income to spend more time raising their children.
They’re the ones in charge of making sure everyone in the family stays healthy as much as possible.
They’re cooking healthy food, researching vaccines, and—if they’re not homeschooling—they’re staying on top of what their kids are learning at school.
These moms feel guilty that they don’t work more or make more money—but thank goodness they don’t.
The work they do in taking care of their families is absolutely PRICELESS.
These moms see posts from big names in chiropractic on Facebook about 10Xing everything. That success in practice is only found in the numbers and the volume.
And again, they feel guilty.
Worse now, they feel less than.
How do I know?
Because I AM one of these moms.
I am the same as you.
(And dare I even go into the realm of feeling guilty for wanting to stay home with your babies, but also feeling guilty for wanting to go to work...)
As I sit here writing from my heart to share with you—and my little girls play with the neighbor boys—I feel guilty. Yes.
But you know what else I feel?
...healthy because I make food at home and sleep as much as possible.
...happy that my daughters are so healthy thanks to the education I was lucky enough to receive.
...satisfied each day knowing that I serve amazing women who I’m 10,426% excited about working with every. single. day. (aka, my ideal patients and clients)
...free because unlike so many other moms, I’m in a profession where I can set my own hours and take a day off when and if I need or want.
...grateful that, yes, because my husband works a job that pays a good salary we always have everything we need and most of what we want.
Guilt may always be there, my dear.
One day you might feel guilty when you’ve retired and you’re spending your days spoiling your grandchildren, while other people your age are still working hourly jobs just to make ends meet.
Yes, the guilt may always be there. It may never go away.
Feeling guilty about the great life you’ve been given can continue to cloud your vision—preventing you from seeing your life as it truly is.
Or, you can choose what you focus on.
And what you focus on grows.
Remember… The 3 T’s: Thoughts, Traumas, Toxins.
You’re working every day to clear yourself, your family and your patients of physical traumas and chemical toxins.
Do not overlook what work needs to be done to remove the thoughts that are causing the subluxations between your ears.
Write in a gratitude journal.
Repeat these three steps until you've cleared your subluxations (and then put yourself on a wellness plan).